๐๐๐ข๐๐๐๐ฎ ๐๐๐๐ฃ๐๐๐๐ฉ (sแดแดแดแด แดส ษช แดษชษขสแด)
Hey, market.
Hatewatch this.
Itโs a riot.
โโโโโโโโโโโโ๏ผช๏ผฑ๏ผค
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโm.v.d.
โโโโโโโโ๐
๐.
AN INTRODUCTORY NOTE REGARDING A CRYPTIC CLAIM:
Paid subscribers, earthwalking angels that they are, were promised an offering behind a paywall a few posts back.
A same-day midnight dead-drop of what I believe I had termed โsome real psycho shit.โ
I FAILED TO DELIVER.
Iโll try to do it tonight.
I have produced a cursed object, and I really want to show it to you.
Stick it under your nose and see what you think.
[VIGNETTE BLIP]
Iโm sorry.
Honey, honey.
Iโm sorry.
Honey.
Iโll make it to your next game, I promise.
Performance, I mean, not game, God Iโ
No, Iโ
Listen.
Honey, okay โ listen?
Iโm going to take pictures and everything, I promise you.
I promise.
[TRAUMA SNIP]
Iโll take ownership.
Artโs a partnership.
Iโm a pirate.
I take over ships.
And I go over.
Like the Hindenburg.
Underskin.
Withlike everyword.
Forgive my lagging oaths.
Sackcloth tatters close.
Sacramental sacrilege.
Sacrificial growth.
Incremental inchworm.
Gross.
Lost.
Eros.
You treat that snake like a garden hose.
And tell me how it goes.
Now as for your attention:
Letโs be sure to flip a mention of a factual fling:
An audience is a precious thing.
Conditioningโs in listening.
You can drop the ball.
But the bell still rings.
Atlas-splat in spittoon sting.
Split your ass in a friccasee.
A fracas or an odyssey.
Evens out it goes odd for me.
If you ever doubted Iโll show you.
Please.
Honey.
Honey.
๐๐.
PRONOUNCED
Harold and his hair had had a falling out.
So he was headed to Ankara.
Where the procedure was much cheaper.
Trying to move that hairline back up.
Fill it in.
โIโm going to Turkey,โ heโd told his daughter.
โItโs Tรผrkiye,โ sheโd said, pointedly.
โWhat?โ
โItโs Tรผrkiye.โ
Eyeroll scathe.
โTurkey.โ
He stared blank.
โTรผrkiye.โ
A scowl and a slammed door.
Teenaged retreat.
He briefly considered stopping payment to the Country Day School but thereโs no way the ex would go for that.
๐ท๐๐โ๐ก ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ก๐ค๐๐ ๐ก ๐ฆ๐๐ข๐ ๐ฆ๐๐๐.
โ
๐๐๐.
REAL REAL REAL MANIPULATOR MUSIC (r.r.r.m.m.)
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF YOU DESIGNED MERCHANDISE FOR THE BAND FUCKED, KNOWN FOR THEIR EPONYMOUS DEBUT ALBUM (EPONYMOUS MEANS THE ALBUM IS ALSO CALLED FUCKED) WITH ITS UNDERGROUND SMASH HIT SINGLE โFUCKED,โ SINCE-REISSUED DOZENS OF TIMES, AND THEN THE COLLAPSE OF CONSENSUS REALITY ENABLED YOU TO RETCON THIS BAND INTO PRIOR EXISTENCE โ LETโS SAY THE EARLY โ80S, I DONโT KNOW, WHO GIVES A FUCK? โ THEN CONVINCE THE PUBLIC THAT THIS IS A CLASSIC TEE (ITโS THE ONE THE SINGER OF FUCKED WORE IN THAT ONE PHOTO, YOU REMEMBER IT, ITโS THE FAMOUS ONE) ON THE ORDER OF E.G. THAT GODDAMN NIRVANA SMILEY FACE SHIRT OR HELL MAYBE EVEN THE STONESโ LIPS
๐๐.
CALMING
To become very calm, calm others.
Check the ceiling.
Call your mother.
๐.
FEMINA RIDENS
Murder she rose.
Prophesied poets.
Thorns in her throat.
Remote controlled.
A clairvoyantโs servant.
Surfacing buoyant.
๐๐.
U.S.A. UP-ALL-NIGHT
My brainโs rotted with TV.
Candy-toothed candidate.
Coprolite skeevy.
Sallow marshmallows.
Footloose and ski free.
I come with the territory.
Come and see me.
๐๐๐.
DEAD KIDDOS
I lost two babies today.
Total humdingers.
Two completed songs.
From a strung-alung singer.
Son-of-a-bitch.
Files corrupted.
Motherfucker.
I HATE A DO-OVER.
I HATE MAKING IT AGAIN.
The new SCALED ALPS record should be done by now.
Should be fucking done by now!
Instead we extend the play for another hour.
My hard-driveโs full.
And my head too.
Whatโs your name?
Itโs nice to meet you.
Again, and again, and again.
๐๐๐๐.
THE DIALER
Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system.
If they found his body tomorrow youโd be wondering if theyโre missing him.
๐๐.
THE CREED FAN
Almost sprayed the Millรฉsime Impรฉrial but took stock of my outfit and its sportiness and reached instead for Aventus.
Pineapple jizz.
Anonymous fizz.
Huff a fix from a spritz.
Perverse putz.
To take up space.
On the downstroke.
To lay to waste.
Triple-lutz.
Get your bets in.
Triple up.
Bear your soul.
Bare A-Cups.
What the fuckโs up.
Been a minute.
Isnโt it?
Ignorant shit.
๐.
A VOICE MEMO (WORK FLOWS)
ALOUD
(0:00) You've seen me for years, walking the streets.
(0:06) Now it's time to perform what I've seen.
(0:13) You've seen me in the galleries, at your shows.
(0:29) You've seen me backstage and in the front row.
(0:34) You've seen me in my clothes, at home.
(0:40) In alcoves.
(0:44) Droves.
(0:48) In love.
(1:06) Maybe you've been on the end of drunken late night memos.
(1:10) Maybe you've lain with me in the grass, green meadows.
(1:15) Just start talking and see where your head goes.
(1:19) It's not a rush job, we're just testing for echo.
(1:22) It's not a rush job, we're just stankin' like Limbaugh.
(1:26) I experience myself externally.
(1:30) Eternally, outside.
(1:31) Outside.
(1:38) Gate kept inside swept.
(1:44) Heartbeat down the middle.
(1:46) 7-10 splat.
(1:57) 737.
(1:59) Attack.
(2:02) Strike attack.
(2:10) Any given flight number can become famous.
(2:14) Any given date might become a famous one too.
(2:20) Any given date could be number one.
(2:24) Any given date could be just the one.
(2:29) We've been needing a new 9-11 to justify some decisions.
(2:39) Drive them hard for a partition.
(2:42) Drive their herd to condition.
(2:44) It's a suicide mission.
(2:47) They all are.
(2:48) That's a tragic admission.
(2:50) They all are.
(2:51) That's a lagging emission.
(2:53) They all are.
(2:54) You have to factor the fiction.
(2:58) It's true.
(2:59) Let's pick a sickly depiction.
(3:06) I've got true Hollywood stories and fake ones that are realer still.
(3:16) Headhunter to copper kill.
(3:20) Snake lines.
(3:25) With the opera feel.
(3:27) I struggle with state change.
(3:37) Understanding hunger pains.
(3:40) The presence of the venoms in the blood among the fangs.
(3:43) The presence of the venoms in the blood among the fangs.
๐๐.
HALVING MANA
SKUs and excuses.
The vicissitudes of vicious feuds.
Powder kegs.
Chaos ensues.
He was a toy oddity.
They loved him for his blondeness and idiocy.
Now theyโll never get rid of me.
Subject shift and self-insert.
Teledildonic phantom flirt.
Marry Sue and sheโll bury you.
In open contempt of court.
Spoiled swine.
Vermin of the vine.
Thought you felt fine then oops! spilled red wine.
Bubbling.
Chilled.
Now you gotta whole other type of time.
Frothering.
Fucking fuck.
Said fuck.
Real loud.
Doubling.
In other words:
Music demands the creation of new languages.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ(as promised) . . .
โโโโ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐.
๐๐๐.
THE SAVING OF FUCKED FACE
Gotta save face.
Mouth fit for a foot.
Words came back.
Clerkโd dropped Bogdan a note.
Donโt know his name either.
The clerkโs.
Not like they wear name-tags.
Fuck no.
You donโt want these creeps knowing your name.
Type of people who come in here.
This liquor store?
Hell no.
Note found its way to Bogdan โ Pseudobogdan, I guess, I donโt know, is that too many syllables, too evocative of โHobgoblin?โ, I donโt know, I donโt know, Iโ
Bogdanโs talking:
โBecause you thought I was Bogdan, you will call me Bogdan now. I accept it.โ
Heโs here with me now.
โLook, man, I didnโt mean to generalize.โ
The liquor storeโs half-lit cold fluorescent.
โI donโt care. It means nothing to me.โ
Iโm lit as shit off scavenged domestics.
โI thought you were Bosnian, or Serbian, or some other type of people who hate each other, I mean I guess everybody hates everybody, right? I mean you hate me, right?โ
Past a certain point you pick your pleasure.
โWhy I would hate you? You hate me?โ
Iโm not here to lecture.
โNo, of course I donโt hate you.โ
Get the tape and measure.
โThen why you would think I hate you?โ
Steep inclines and surfing ventures.
โObvious reasons.โ
I canโt believe we won the fucking goddamn Powerball.
โBecause you are white?โ
$2.04 billion.
โNo, because I steal shit. Wait, are you not white?โ
Run that back.
โIโm Syrian, from Armenia.โ
$2,040,000,000.
โThose are different places. Iโm not that stupid.โ
Four-Eight-Seven-Five-Zero-Five-Nine-Nine-Five-Zero-Nine-Eight.
โYou keep putting words in my mouth. I never call you stupid.โ
We hit on 4-8-7-5-0-5-9-9-5-0-9-8.
โDo Syrians and Armenians hate each other? I donโt mean to be ignorant. I just donโt knowโโ
Looked like this:
โฃ-โง-โฆ-โค-โช-โค-โจ-โจ-โค-โช-โจ-โง
โMy sisters fight.โ
Looked like my lucky fucking day.
โWhat do you mean?โ
But Bogdan had the other half of the ticket.
โYou said it โ everybody hating everybody.โ
Hell I hadnโt even known weโd hit until an hour ago.
โSometimes.โ
Had to track his ass down, that other clerkโd been no help at all.
โSometimes, yes.โ
He wasnโt at the liquor store like Iโd expected him to be.
"So I was way off, then, thinking you were Bosnian, what is that, what is that, like, 2000 miles? 1000 miles?โ
Shit, heโs always there.
โI donโt know. Far.โ
For all I fucking know the guy lives there . . .
Thief pulls out the phone, jabs at it.
A comparison:
โSays Aleppo โ is Aleppo a good city to use?โ
โAleppo is fine.โ
โBut are you from Aleppo?โ
โNo.โ
โWell wheโโ
โDonโt worry about where I am from.โ
โOhโ okay. I, sorry, Iโโ
โDonโt worry too much about me.โ
Headshake yes.
โI am Bogdan now. I am from USSR now.โ
He laughs low.
โCโmon, man, you wonโt even tell me your real name just cuz I fucked up, you donโt need to rake me over the coals.โ
โRaking coals?โ
โLike, excoriate me.โ
โThis means to kill you in a storage space?โ
A smile that isnโt one.
โSo Aleppo to โ uh, Ilidลพa?โ (pronounced wrong) โIlidลพa? Do you know Ilidลพa?โ
Headshake no.
โIlidลพa. Ilidลพa. Says itโs 2483 kilometers. Thatโs driving, though, I think.โ
โYou donโt want to drive that.โ
โIโm not sure, Iโm not sure if thatโs as the crow flies. Could be as the crow flies. I donโt know how to get it to give me that. Whatโs that, whatโs twenty four hundred kilometers, thatโs like 1500, right, 1500 miles?โ
More jabbing.
A calculation.
โShit, 1542.865 miles. I got a pretty good range on it . . .โ
โYou do understand some things.โ
โCurved it.โ
Impenetrable straight-smile.
โSo you donโt consider yourself white?โ
โNot lately.โ
โDo you consider yourself, a, uh, MENA person.โ
โNo Iโm a nice guy.โ
No idea if heโs just the most poker-faced joker.
(donโt think so)
โI wonder what Bogdan means.โ
The newly christened liquor clerk draws his own device.
Curious at his new self.
Search returns.
โGift from god.โ
Bogdan repeated it.
โGift from god.โ
Thief wondered if Bogdan speaks a capital-G God.
No polite way of knowing.
โHowโs it suit you?โ
Thief asked.
โIโll take it.โ
A thiefโs task:
โWe are billionaires now.โ
Bogdan is stern.
โNot after taxes.โ
๐๐๐๐.
WINTER
Itโs six o-clock.
I thought it was nine.
Iโd considered retiring.
To bed and sheets.
To my relief or rubbing.
The still of the early evening.
It feels impossible.
Timeโs short change.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโpresented in
โโโโโโโโโโโโโFRAGMENTED REALITY
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโa subsidiary of
โโโโโโ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโInevitability โ Delivered.โ
I AM A WARPED CHARACTER. โโโโIT IS OK. โโโโโTHANK YOU.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโSELECT ME?
โโโโโโโ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ . . .
๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ / a / k / a
๏ผช๏ผฑ๏ผค is a self-taught integrated media company founded haunted and enchanted in ๐ป๐พ๐๐ ๐ด๐๐พ๐, ๐ฒ๐ฐ.
โThank you . . .
Thank you.โ